Month: July 2013
Twerking . . . Friend or Foe?!?!
For some of y’all who don’t know, there has been a Twerking epidemic in America. In countless clubs from the East to West Coast, drunk girls have fallen under the spell of the Twerk which causes them to get into a 2 point stance or on all 4(s) on the floor and shake their booty to hip-hop beats as they try to attract their mate (for the night).
Let me explain this Twerk a little more. According to Wikipedia, Twerking is a “dance move (debatable) that involves a person (preferably a woman) shaking their upper hips and lower hips in an up and down bouncing motion, causing them to shake, ‘wobble’ and ‘jiggle’ To ‘twerk’ means to ‘dance in a sexually suggestive fashion by twisting the hips.’”
To help explain the image of this cursed, but enticing movement (I mean come on guys, it’s great to see in da club), here is a video of a girl performing this act:
Not only are nightclubs in America infested with this (insert positive or negative adjective here) range of motion, but so are our high schools. Our nations youth are feeling “Twerk Fever.”
In San Diego, 33 high school girls were suspended for a Twerk video that they filmed and posted on YouTube.
The principal suspended the teenagers involved because it was filmed on school grounds using school equipment. (Sucks they got suspended, but funny as hell).
So ladies, if you feel your intoxicated friend is about to get-her-Twerk-on, please stop her from embarrassing herself. And gentlemen, do the right thing and protect her lady status in high society . . .
. . . or you can take the devilishly hilarious alternative route.
Upon a situation where you feel the need to Twerk, you may be under the influence or just simply bored. So you may encourage the Twerkness to happen. You maybe feel the need to tell your drunk female, or male, friend to shake her (or his) booty in the air like it’s protesting something at San Francisco State. (If y’all don’t know, they’re a lot of protests at SF State).
It does not matter if they are doing it right or wrong, just make sure you have a camera out to film that shit so you can embarrass the shit out of them later.
Here is a funny Twerk video of a woman getting out-Twerk at an iHop . . . BY A GUY!
As you can tell, at the end of the video the woman notices her defeat and tries to rebuttal her loss with some more booty shaking. However, all that ass is not enough to regain the upper hand (or cheek).
So note this girls, just because you are a woman, or super attractive with an amazing booty that is a gift from God, you can still lose a Twerk battle due to your poor technique.
Check out this male who has foully caught the Twerk disease (but it’s super fuckin funny to watch this Asian guy scare the Twerk outta White people in Canada).
Now that you know, it is in your power to stop this “Twerk Fever” from spreading even more . . . or help it spread so you can laugh your Twerk off!
-Hoping for the best, Sype
PS, Hot chicks in the club Twerking . . . HOT! And if you’re not, please don’t try, nobody wants to have nightmares later.
PSS, here is an awesome video of a guy asking a girl out to prom with the POWER OF TWERKING!!! Shake that booty brotha, Shake that booty!
My Life as of Now
Since I’ve graduated college has been surreal. I wish I had more time to write but it’s deff been hard. Thankfully my partner KokoKai has been here to post something in the mean time. Hopefully soon I can write something more indept but for now I will leave yall about how I feel now when I think about post college and post EDC
Recovering from festivals in 4 easy steps Sleep,
Aside Posted on Updated on
Recovering from festivals in 4 easy steps
Sleep, water/pedialyte, vitamins, talk to your crew as much as possible
1. Sleep:
Yes, it is the number 1 way to recover from the madness, yet it is the activity we are least likely to engage in- because it requires time.
Give yourself the time, you need it. You don’t have to take a week off of work, there are a few simple things you can do to maximize your regularly allotted snooze time. 1. A dark room: dark curtains! Or you can tack a dark sheet/blanket/towel over your window to keep out as much light as possible. Remove any bright lights from your room or cover them with something. Examples: the bright red numbers on your alarm clock, the little red dots that shine out of the TV, DVD player, computers, etc. Believe it or not, those little bright lights can be a distraction. If all else fails- swoop some sleeping pills.
2. Water/pedialyte:
You need a healthy balance of H2O and electrolytes. Don’t pick 1 over the other- you need both. Gatorade or Powerade also replenish electrolytes, but they have loads of sugars & carbs. Those are only appropriate when working out. You don’t need all that when you’re laying in bed~ just need the good ol’ electrolytes.
3. Vitamins:
Choose a well-rounded multi-vitamin, make sure you have a high percentage of iron and calcium in there. If you’re feeling extra sore from all the dancing and running around, get some extra supplements. Potassium will help with those crazy muscle spasms, and L-Glutamine assists muscle recovery. The body needs to be restocked on vitamins and minerals after the crazy shenanigans that took place. Be good to your body~ you only get 1!
4. Your crew:
If you’re like me, then you have 2,000+ miles and the Pacific Ocean separating you from your raging crew. Don’t fret! The beauty of technology is that it’ll make you feel like you’re right next to your friends again! Utilize the basics~ texts, phone calls, snapchat….you can even get extra techy and organize some group google+ hangouts. In order to beat that lingering grey rain cloud that’s following you around, talk to your friends! Reminisce on all the memories, flip through the photos and videos, and start making plans for the next event.
ZipperSquad!!!
PEDCSD is no joke my friends. It’s a serious condition that, if not treated properly, will have a negative impact on your whole life.
Lets rave safely.
-KokoKai
“or do what I did and drink a bunch of Gatarade and sleep for 20 hours” – Airec
Inside the Dark Minds of Koko and Airec 