Races: #4. SuperSpar Bela Bela Marathon
A successful race! Read about KokoKai’s epic journey at the SuperSpar marathon in Bela Bela.
“Another marathon down. Sometimes I forget I’m in South Africa” – KokoKai
It was hot as balls, but I survived!
My first alarm went off at 1:50am and by 2am we were in the car and on the road. We arrived at the race site by 5, giving us just enough time to check in at registration, use the restroom and get ourselves prepared. My host mom gave me a big, warm hug and we wished each other good luck [she was running the 5k]. The gun went off at precisely 5:30 and away I ran!
The SuperSpar marathon in Bela Bela was a race of contrasts. The first 20km or so was pretty flat and I was feeling good about it. It would be quite misleading to any runners that hadn’t already studied the course map for elevation gains. I was constantly checking my posture and making sure my alignment was good. I knew that if I was kind to my…
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Hoes vs Pros: An Empowering Women’s Guide to EDC
Hoes vs Pros: An Empowering Women’s Guide to EDC
We’ve written about EDC many times in previous posts on our blog, mostly mocking the stereotypes that revolve around going to raves, and poking satirical fun. Well it’s a kicks and giggles until someone gets taken away on a stretcher. Now is the time to buckle down for some serious rave talk.
This year may be your first EDC ever, or maybe you’ve been around the massive block once or twice. Whatever your situation may be, there is always room for improvement in the massive game. Where to start? Well, there is a hell of a lot more to EDC than just attending the event. Here are some tid bits that may help…learned from friends and through personal experience.
Every day leading up to EDC has an impact on the whole experience
When you’re standing in the middle of a 300,000 people mosh pit…
holding hands with your best friends…
surrounded by the ones you love…
and you could cry over how beautiful it all is…
everything is so perfect…
That is what EDC is all about.
Lets make sure we prepare ourselves for it this magical moment.
Disclaimer: These tips are coming from a female perspective. Although some points are applicable to all genders, if you’re a guy you’ll want to check out my male-counterpart’s dude version: Bros vs Pros- A Male’s Guide To EDC 2014.
Getting Prepped For EDC
Diet & Exercise: You want to act as if preparing for a 3 day marathon. Meaning that you need to eat lean, train mean, and be ready for the most intense cardio you’ve ever experienced in your life. I won’t go into dieting details (I’m vegan so I doubt you’d follow my dietary recommendations), but to put it simply, EAT WELL IN THE WEEKS LEADING UP TO EDC. Don’t scarf down pizza and burgers every day then find yourself in the motor speedway huffing and puffing for dear life after only 5 minutes of fist-pumping. That being said, don’t starve yourself either. Your muscles need protein and some carb storage to fuel this 3 day carnival. Carbs are your friends.
ABS: Abs are made in the kitchen- not in the gym. NUFF SAID.
Pro Tip: Cardio – Do whatever cardio form that floats your boat. Aim for keeping that heart rate between 100-120 beats per minute without passing out.
Pro Tip – Spend significant time on a calf-raiser machine. You’ll thank me when you find yourself in the mosh pit of Kinetic Field, trapped shoulder to shoulder with glittery chicks and sweaty bros, no shuffling room, no elbow room; the only dance move you can attempt is a completely vertical up-and-down jumping motion, with an occasional fist pump thrown in. Your gastrocs need to be formally trained for this.
Supplies: Gum & chapstick: You are allowed to bring gum and chapstick into the motor speedway as long as they are sealed. So go to the store, buy 3 individually sealed packs of gum, and 3 individually sealed things of chapstick. Bring 1 to each day of EDC. If you’re the type of person that doesn’t usually chew gum or need chapstick when you’re feeling yourself – bring them anyway. Trade them for light shows, massages, or just give them out for free because you’re a nice person. DO IT. Vics nasal inhaler – you’re not allowed to bring these in, so you must sneak them in. I’ll let you figure out how to do that on your own.
Pro Tip: A small pack of tissues. As sucky as it is- you will find yourself in a port-o-potty that doesn’t have toilet paper. Also bring a small bottle of hand sany. Disclaimer: some security guards might not let you bring these 2 things in, while others won’t care. It’s a hit or miss, but it’s always worth a try!
Pro Tip: Bring a fanny pack/small backpack (must be smaller than 12 in x 12 in – Insomniac regulation). CanNOT be a plush material.
You do not have enough pockets or bra space for all the shit you will need for EDC. Trust me on this- you need something that straps to your body to hold all your shit. Phone, keys, 3-day pass card, chapstick, gum, kandi, any and all other random whit you will accrue throughout the course of the night. Don’t ask me how, but you will accumulate random shit…3D glasses, sunglasses, stuff you buy at the merchandise tent. Oh, and of course your Insomniac reusable aluminum water bottle.
Pro Tip: A watch- You don’t wanna dig through your bag and pull out your cell every time you wanna know what time it is. That will create too many opportunities for losing your phone, and also drain your battery. If you’re like the Zips and you have 8-12 DJs to see per night, it’s extremely helpful to have a wrist watch to keep track of the time and know when you need to move stages or when you have a meeting time with the rest of the crew.
Attire: OH boy, this is all individual. But some pro tips I have for attire would be:
1. Sunglasses. When the sky starts to lighten around the 5am hour, and dawn breaks over the motor speedway, you will really really really appreciate sunglasses to hide the mascara and glitter streaked around your dime-sized pupils. Cover that shit up. Keep sunglasses in whatever stuff-carrying-device you choose to strap to yourself.
2. Comfy shoes. Ladies, do NOT wear heels, slippers, or strappy sandals. Full-foot-covering tennis shoes are the way to go. Common choices also are TOMS,Vans and slip-ons like Ed Hardys. My advice is to go with something similar.
DON’T’S: Steer clear of anything you will constantly have to fumble with all night. Realistically, you will be in that motor speedway for at least 10-12 hours (if you go as hard as the Zipper Squad). The last person you wanna be is that girl who stops the whole group asking for help readjusting, re-tying, “help me I don’t know what to do because my wimpy bra strap just broke,” type of person. Anything you wear into that motor speedway is gonna come out dusty, dirty, covered in sweat, glitter, body paint, and tears. Accept this fact and you will have graduated to the level of Pro EDC outfit planner.
Don’t bring anything into the speedway that you aren’t prepared to lose, damage, or break. Shiz happens. Leave valuables at the hotel.
Pro Tips: Re-enforce all of your bra straps – meaning get a needle and thread and make sure you sew that shit solid, so there will be no wardrobe malfunctions in the middle of the night. Do this for everything and anything you think might be flimsy and easily breakable on your outfits. Tutus are the way to go. Life would be better all-around if we could just wear tutus all the damn time, but we can’t. So take advantage of this 3 day circus and wear a tutu every day. Tutus are simple, low-maintenance, and super effing cute.
Pro Tip: If you drove, take pictures of everything around your car: landmarks, light poles, scenery. This will help you find your car when its 6am and its time to leave. The last thing you want is to be roaming the dusty desert parking lot for 3 hours because you can’t find your car and don’t remember where you parked because you were too excited to pay attention the night before. (This has happened) -_-
Solidify The Night’s Schedule: Take a few minutes to run through your crew’s plan. What time you’re leaving, what sets to see/your set schedule, what time you’re leaving, group meet up times and group photos. If you roll with a large crew (50+), this planning time is absolutely necessary. Or even if it’s just you and a couple friends, communication is key to enhancing everyone’s EDC experience. Don’t just assume people know what’s going on.
Pro tip: Have a meeting time & place every few hours.
Example: meet at the drop-zone, OR THE ZIPPER, at 10pm, 12am, 2am and 4am. This way, if anyone is lost, or if you just wanna connect with other group members, you’ll always have a time and place to gather together.
Inside the speedway: Zipper Squad always meets at the Zipper.
So the magical moment has come. You begin your descent down the bleachers and are holding back the tears while looking out at the shimmery heaven that is the Las Vegas Motor Speedway. What do you do first? MERCH TENT for water bottles, potty break, then hit your first stage. Or if your crew doesn’t have a set you wanna see at that moment – pick a ride to go on! But first things, first. WATER. Hydrate the f**k up. Stand in that line, get your reusable Insomniac bottle, and worship that thing for the next 3 days. Hoes allow themselves to dehydrate. Or if they do choose to down some agua, they buy plastic bottles and trash the planet.
Pro Tip: reusable Insomniac bottle. DO IT. Plus it’s a super awesome souvenir to take back to reality. I still use mine erry damn day.
Before the magic set in and your eyes are too jittery on euphoric emotions to read the speedway map, mentally mark out where each of the restrooms are. Hint – there are four, one in each ‘corner’ of the speedway.
Pro Tip: When facing the stands, the restrooms in the corner on the left of the bleachers are the most well-lit, least-used, and therefore cleanest bathrooms.
Pro Tip: ALWAYS GO WITH YOUR GROUP. NEVER SOLO-MISSION TO THE BATHROOMS!!! Make your group go together all at once. Even if someone says they don’t need to go, remind them that it’s better to at least try now then to be in the middle of a rage-fest set and to have to dig out to find the bathrooms alone.
Pro Tip: Always kill 2 birds with 1 stone when it comes to water and bathrooms. You’re already out & about. Might as well make sure everyone is good on water & bathrooms in the same trip.
Pro Tip: Wanna boost your magical experience back up? Eat a fresh orange, and wash it down with some fresh-squeezed lemonade. You will not be disappointed. There are tents for fresh fruits and fresh lemonade. TAKE ADVANTAGE!!!
Keep from cramping!!! Buy some Powerade and alternate your water intake with Powerade intake.
Pro Tip: Don’t wanna pay $6 for a 16oz Powerade? Sneak in a Pedialyte electrolyte powder pack. It’s tiny- like the size of a stick of gum. Mix that shiz in your Insomniac bottle with some water. I personally prefer the Pedialyte route. But whichever you use, don’t be a hoe and think you only need water to survive. ELECTROLYTES SAVE LIVES.
Pro Tip: Designate a meeting place. Whoever you drove with or took the shuttle with: Have a meeting point for when the night is over. Hoes be like “I know we won’t separate so its fine”. Then you do separate, all of your cell phones die, or you don’t get reception. It’s 7am, you can’t find anybody. You don’t wanna go into the parking lot because what if they’re not out there? But security is kicking you out of the speedway. You don’t remember where the car is. Or you don’t know where the shuttle picks up. What do you do?? Take the leadership role early in the night and tell your friends what’s up. Say “Hey at 6am, we all meet at the Hug Life bear sign”.
Pro Tip: ALWAYS PREPARE FOR THE WORST!!!!
The Next Day
So It’s Time To Leave The Speedway: Refill your Insomniac bottle BEFORE you leave the speedway. You’ll want water for that 2 hour traffic jam getting out of the parking lot. ESPECIALLY if you’re shuttling it. If you drove, keep some water in your car for the drive home. Having water on hand is ALWAYS a good idea.
Pro Tip: the volunteers working the water refill stations abandon post usually before 5am. Get water before it’s too late. Make this a priority.
Supplements: You better bring whatever supplements you normally take at home, to Vegas. If you don’t normally take anything, well now is the time to start. It’s 8am. You have less than 12 hours to sleep, shower, and re-nourish your body before you’re back in the speedway again.
Pro Tip: bring a bottle of ibuprofen (your feet will hurt), a bottle of Rave Aid or 5-HTP (balance out your serotonin), and a bottle of potassium (reduce muscle cramps). Hoes will leave Vegas super dehydrated, nutrient-deficient, and sick with a fever. You just put your body through absolute hell. There is a right way to get it back to rage-face preparedness. Vitamin and water up.
Food After EDC: What to eat? Your body is going through a weird combination of still feeling magical so you’re not really hungry, but you need to feed your starving muscle children (broscience reference), all while you’re fighting that I’m-about-to-throw-up feeling. Stick with something simple.
Pro Tip: Have a bag of bagels and jar of peanut butter in your room, along with hella bananas. That way you can throw some nutrients into your stomach before noon, without having to leave the room. Take a shower, take a nap, and once you’ve digested some basic calories, you’ll be ready to brave the Las Vegas strip in search of a meal.
Pro Tip: Earl of Sandwich inside Planet Hollywood… perfectly sized hot, fresh sandwiches! They also sell a number of side pastas, fruits, and pastries. Plus, while part of your crew holds down your place in line, the rest of the crew can shoot over to Fat Tuesday (one Conveniently located in Planet Hollywood also!). You’re in Vegas: it’s never too early to start drinking! Not a day goes by where the ZipperSquad doesn’t snag some Earls and Fat Tuesdays!
Pro Tip: More sleep. Squeeze in another nap if possible. Even if only 30 mins to an hour. Mentally, you don’t think you need it. But physically, your body is DYING for a little more rest time. You don’t have to actually sleep if you really don’t want to. But fully lay down in bed and allow your legs to recuperate.
Pro Tip: Massage some lotion into your legs and feet. They need the extra TLC, moisture, and it will help with the soreness a lot.
I hope now you feel slightly more prepared to tackle the EDC beast. It’s a magical journey, you deserve to have the best possible experience.
Once you leave Vegas, the emotional after effects can be severe and it’s best to acknowledge the emotional roller coaster that you will feel in the days and weeks following EDC. For tips on dealing with PEDCSD (Post Electric Daisy Carnival Stress Disorder), see this blog.
A lot of these tips seem like simple no-brainers but, oh boy, do they make a world of difference in your experience.
I wouldn’t say I’m a master…there’s still so much to learn; through surviving countless massives, there are a lot of things I’ve fudged up. And through those mistakes- I learned the right ways to rave.
Don’t be a hoe raver; BE A PRO RAVER!
A Bros Quick Tips to Working Out for Festivals
Alright Bros, with festival season quickly approaching us, or here with EDC just a few hours away, we have to kick our asses in high gear and whip it in shape!
Let’s look at this, so you wanna get girls like her:
So you realize that you need to look like this:
However, you look like this 😦
But have no fear, here are some simple things that you can either do at the gym or around your house to get into that ripped, sweaty abs showing, buff-fist-pumping shape to get the “Bytches.”
First workout that I recommend is the pushup. Every bro out there loves chest, which is why every testosterone-pump-jockey hounds the bench. But you don’t need a bench to have a nice chest; all you need is the ground and your body.
The great thing about pushups is that it doesn’t only work out your chest, but it also works out your shoulders, back, triceps, and yes, the ever so mighty core. When you’re benching, the bench takes away from working your core and just focuses on your bigger muscles, neglecting the smaller muscles that is needed to hold everything together. When you are in a pushup position, you force your core to use itself to hold still, which also engages your back muscles. And this is just from holding that position alone. Remember, the missionary position is basically a plank, or a push-up position; you’re not gonna bench a girl during sex.
“Oh Airec, if I only do pushups, my chest won’t get bigger.”
Maybe your chest won’t get bigger, but it will be more toned. And do you really need a big chest at a rave anyways? You’re trying to look RIPPED here, not match-that-hot-chick-next-to-you bra-size.
Second workout I would suggest is the pull-up. The pull-up is great because it works out your shoulders, back, biceps, and forearms. There many different ways to do a pull-up. You can do overhand or underhand grip, close grip or wide. Of course the different grip and width of your pull-up will target and shape your back differently. I’m not gonna go into the different kinda pull-ups, but you can click on the hyperlink and explore it yourself.
The reason why I believe pull-ups are important is because when you are dancing and a girl is checking you out (AKA creeping from afar), it’s from either the side or the back. Usually the back as you’re fist pumping away to LEVELS (bro). So when she’s checking you out, you want her to think “damn, that guy gots a nice back,” not “damn, you can see his flab vibrate every time he fist pumps. It kinda goes to the beat.” This way the longer her eyes are on you, you have a higher chance of catching her predatory glare when you turn around.
A third workout that is super important is squats. Friends don’t let friends miss leg days. Think about it, at a festival you’re always on your feet, jumping around, or “shuffling.” I put that in quotations because come on guys, when we’re seeing an artist (drunk or sober) we all jump around and move our feet. We like to think we are shuffling although we are just jumping around like dumb-asses hoping that everyone else would understand your spastic leg movements as shuffling. (I do this all the time.) If your butt is too sore, just jump around. WORK OUT THOSE CALVES!!!
Also, another important thing about doing squats, or lower body workouts in general, is your ability to hoist a girl onto your shoulders. I mean come on guys, we have all been there. Whether there is a random cutie around or a girl that you’re into, you wanna show her how awesomely strong you are and hope that she asks you to put her on your shoulders. This way you can impress her with your strength as she admires the crowd from a skyline view and all the other bros can respect your strength.
So do those squats, make that ass clap.
These three workouts should help you out for festivals. If you do these workouts with high reps and increase frequency to increase heart rate, then you’ll be burning away your beer belly in no time.
Now I’m not saying that these three workouts are the only things that you should only do. Of course throw in some abdominal exercises, cardio, and the piece de resistance, arm workouts (suns out guns out baby). Gotta make sure those abs are rock hard just in case you wanna wipe the sweat off your face with the bottom of your tank exposing your abs discreetly. We’ve all been there bro, yadda mean.
Obviously I’m not a kinesiology major, or a doctor, like my partner KokoKai, so you can take what I say with a grain, or a canister, of salt. I’m not in the best shape ever, but I still know a little bit of helpful advice. This is what has worked out for my friends and I so I just wanted to share some of it with you, with some additional (panda) commentary. Plus you don’t want to be that awkward guy at a festival telling your in-shape friends to put on their tank/shirts just because they have abs and you don’t . . . I’ve been there before.
So good luck hunting my fellow bros, #tanktoptime
P.S. Don’t forget cardio and diet, workouts are nothing without a good foundation of cardio and diet.
P.S.S. But that doesn’t mean stop eating your fave food or drinking beer, cuz I know I enjoy shitty food and beer (;P)
How Chicks Get Ready for EDC
~~~How chicks get ready for EDC~~~
Step 1: Eat less.
That’s right. The #1 way girls ‘get in shape for EDC’ is by eating less.
Notice: I didn’t say ‘watching what you eat’ or ‘making smarter eating choices’.
Oh, no. That would require legitimate knowledge of nutrition and healthy diet planning.
This is the thought process girls go through…
“Instead of eating 4 cookies, I’ll eat 3. I need to lose weight for EDC.”
“Maybe I should only have soda every other day. Gotta get that EDC body ready!”
“If I eat a salad with my burger, the greens cancel the fat out- its a wash. So it’s like I didn’t eat.”
No need worry about healthy substitutions or purposeful meal planning to stock up on necessary vitamins and minerals for the upcoming marathon of drinking and substance abuse. Nope. Just eat less. That’ll do the trick.
Step 2 for getting that bod ready for a week of partying is to work on ‘abs’.
Traditional situps and crunches are the way to go. The abdominals are only engaged during the first 45 degrees of the movement, while the second 45 degrees engage the iliacus and psoas major more than the abdominals. Which is exactly why we transition into crunches. So we can not target the abs, but we think that we are!
mechanical advantages of pulley systems & how it means your whole life has been a lie.
Hey there! Finally put the finishing touches on a report for my strength & conditioning program design class. Last week, we had more of a hands-on lab inside my university’s fitness center. We inspected the pulley systems used in a few different types of isolating machines. What we discovered was jaw-dropping (at least for those who frequently use these machines).
Systems of pulleys can decrease the force required to lift a certain amount of weight.
For example, if I want to lift a 100 lb weight, and I have a pulley system with 3 pulleys, that gives me a mechanical advantage of 2. If I use this pulley system, I only have to exert 50 lbs of force to lift the 100 lb weight. (100/2 = 50). Does that make sense?
Now apply this to the strength training machines you see in weight rooms. Most of these machines have a complex system of pulleys. Meaning that you are never actually lifting the amount of weight you think you are.
Pulley LAB # 1/ 2-14-12
Measurement ofApplied Resistance From Selected
Koleana Kai McGuire
The pulley lab definitely challenged the way we look at strength training machines by critically examining a variety of exercise equipment. Looking at its overall apparatus set up and design, and specifically each of its pulley systems and its impact on the “perceived” load. It made me realize that some manufactures didn’t take into consideration the effects of pulley systems on weight lifting. This is important as a user of these types of machines, because now I have a more accurate understanding of the weight that’s being lifted. As well as a future professional when training clients, I will know what recommendations to make, and how best to design strength training programs based upon the equipment available.
Apparatus # 1: Pulldown
Brand Name: Equalizer
Description of: 3 lines of pull attached to load, 1 line as free end pulling down
Apparatus Commonly used for tricep extensions
# pulleys 1 movable pulley
Trial (lbs) 70 lbs
Notes Measured 32.5 lbs on spring scale, which is pretty close to the predicted weight by our formula
P = ½ x (70 lbs) = 35 lbs
This is assuming that the pull is smooth and has no friction.
However, there must be some friction and with P measured at 35 lbs,
Conclusion: The plates actually weigh less than we are lead to believe.
Apparatus # 2 Pulldown
Brand Name Magnum
Description of 2 pulleys
Apparatus Commonly used for bicep curls
# pulleys 2 movable pulley
Trial (lbs) 50 lbs
Notes Measured 30 lbs on spring scale, which is greater than the force of pull as predicted by our formula
P = ½ x (50 lbs) = 25 lbs
This is assuming that the pull is smooth and has no friction.
However, there must be some friction making more force required to pull the weight.
Conclusion: The plates may actually weigh less than we are lead to believe.
Apparatus # 3: Pull ups
Brand Name: Life Fitness
Description of: 3 lines of pull attached to load, 1 line as free end pulling down
Apparatus: Can be used for bicep pull ups
# pulleys: 2 pulleys
Trial (lbs): 50 lbs
Notes: Measured 52 lbs on spring scale, which is almost the same force of pull indicated by the weights.
This is assuming that the pull is smooth and has no friction.
Conclusion: The manufacturers of this apparatus designed the machine to accurately measure the force exerted. Meaning that the user is actually lifting (almost exactly) the amount of weight selected with the pins.
Apparatus # 4: Wheelchair accessible
Brand Name: Uppertone
Description of: lever systems
Apparatus: Can be used for upper body workouts, like the chest and arms, for people in wheel chairs
# pulleys: N/A
Trial (lbs): 30 lbs. The weight could vary depending on how the lever was oriented.
Notes: When the axis of rotation changes, the required force to move the weight changes.
Conclusion: The manufacturers of this apparatus designed it differently from traditional weight machines. The user can increase or decrease the required force by changing the axis for the levers, whereas most other machines will do so by changing the weight plates. By increasing the force arm, we decreased the force required to lift the weight- from 22 lbs to 5 lbs.
Mariner’s Ridge Hike
Went on a super legit hike with some friends today, it’s called Mariner’s Ridge (or Kaluanui Ridge Trail), and it’s a ridge line that connects to the Ko’olau summit. Follow Kaluanui road all the way up and park before the dead end. There is a shingled house on the right, that a lot of folks call the “gingerbread house.” There is a “No Tresspassing” sign at the entrance to the trail… (O.o) dangerous.
We stumbled through some areas where the ground was a complete web of tree roots that were surfacing; creating a plexus of bark under our feet.
This hike has all different types of terrain compiled into one awesome workout. We started off with a dirt path, with brush and bushes on either side.
Then we went into forestry. This is the first hawaii hike I’ve done that had legit pine trees. The pine needles faced all directions off of the tree branches. Not much of the pine tree smell I’m used to experiencing in California.
Then the hike led into more of an open dirt path. I see draping valleys of greenery on either side of me as I’m standing atop the ridge line of the mountain.
Through some jungle like forest, I snapped a photo–now this is what most hawaii hikes I’ve been on have looked like.
Here and there, we happened across points that we could see different parts of the island. I have some semi-successful attempts at panoramic shots of the mountains and ocean.
About 40 minutes up the mountain and we reached a clearing with a full 360 degree view from atop the mountain. When I realized there was no more trail is when we made the conclusion that we had reached the top!
We opened up our bags and pulled out some drinks & snacks we had swooped from our Safeway pitstop on the way to the hike.
After taking several photos, I sat down, drank my beer, and then we began our descent back down!
Wingstop Bro-Date Study Break
So while some of us are being productive and doing productive things that coincide with our EDC get-in-shape goals, some of us are not being not productive. And kinda getting fat.
I decided earlier tonight to have a bro-date with my buddy Jose.
What is a bro-date you ask? It is when two bros (male friends who transcends best-friendship, achieving a higher level: Bros) have a non-homosexual hangout session. I will probably do a whole post on Bros in the future.
And to continue my streak of bad eating habits (this morning I also decided to reward my patience by freezing my Asian-ass for 4 hours through the DMV with a big juicy double-double cheese burger from In-N-Out, topped off with a nice warm strawberry doughnut from Krispy Kreme) and have some Wing Stop.
For some of you who do not know, Wingstop is a place where you annihilate chicken wings of all flavors with a side of French-fries. It’s kinda like Hooters . . . but there no boobs. Actually, there are boobs, but in baggy dark green polo’s instead of being squeezed together, about to pop out of a tight tank-top, boobs.
Boy, were those wings delicious. I had the spicy Cajun lemon chicken flavored wings. Just as the name suggest, it was a Cajun spiced chicken wing with a hint of lemon. And the fries? Crispy, some where a little burnt and slightly over salted . . . just how I like ‘em.
Take that cholesterol.
Along some great conversation with my buddy Jose, it was a great bro-date.
Sadly to say, to go along the theme of aging this weekend, I’m starting to realize that I’m getting old. Not old-man-Eric-Juno old, but just getting older.
Now don’t get me wrong, me getting older doesn’t mean I’m getting more mature. I don’t actually know when that’s gonna happen, but my body cannot handle certain foods at the dark of night anymore. And sometimes my hearing is bad and my back aches.
Now take me away Tums, or Walgreens knock-off brand Tums. Fat-Airec my still live inside me, but old Airecs stomach does not agree (:/)
Oh and P.S. FUCK the DMV.
“Eats flavored antacid tablets, candy substitute”
I love night running down the middle of an empty street after a fresh rainstorm, makes me feel like I’m in a Nike commercial. = deep thoughts of a Unicorn.
Resistance Band work outs
I had to turn in a report on resistance bands for my Strength & Conditioning Program Design class (as mentioned in a prior post). For any fitness enthusiasts out there, or just anyone curious about this piece of equipment, here is my summation. It’s basically a product description, talks about some mechanical advantages and disadvantages, and my personal opinion on the bands’ effectiveness. Again, this was written for a class, so I apologize if it’s tough to interpret the biomechanical nomenclature, I’m sure you’ll be just fine =) Here ya go!
“Bodylastics Resistance bands / Exercise bands are no longer just for aerobics classes. The cutting edge resistance band systems by Bodylastics stand toe to toe with the biggest and best home gyms, and even fully equipped health clubs. Do over 140 of the best muscle working exercises, on your own terms…anywhere…anytime. I am Blake Kassel, the inventor of the Bodylastics Resistance bands home gym. Are you skeptical that elastic resistance bands could work all of your muscles as well as the HUGE weight machines? Well you should be. But I am here to tell you that you will love this product, and will end up loving our company, because you are going to get in amazing shape and save a ton of cash at the same time. You will absolutely be able to work your muscles to the max. All of the best exercises for the chest, arms, legs, back, shoulders and abs can be performed with this compact workout system. Bodylastics offers resistance band gym systems that can stand toe to toe with the large bulky home gym machines.
Smoothest Resistance – When we were first developing the Bodylastics System, we searched for the smoothest source of resistance on the planet. Well, we found it – elastic resistance tubing (bands). Not only is resistance tubing super smooth when you stretch it, but it is incredibly light and flexible. That means it is easy to store – no extra room needed!”
- Cost: One band- $9.95-$17.95 US dollars depending on if the buyer wants a different amount of resistance.Locations where equipment is most likely to be used: Physical Therapy offices, Rehab facilities, Athletic Training facilities, etc:
- The resistance band is a great tool for rehabilitating specific body parts, so it is found in almost every physical therapy setting. Because the bands can come in variations is resistance, they are often seen in athletic training settings, too.
- Governing mechanism for providing resistance?
- Resistance bands are rubber tubes with handles on both ends that provide resistance as you row, curl, and otherwise extend them. The handles and the clipping mechanisms at the end of each band can be detached. The bands can be combined on the handles to generate a heavy load. Resistance bands hold their own when one is resistance training. They are good for giving the muscles something a little different to control; the weight actually increases as you extend them. The handles are cushioned and comfortable and the clipping mechanisms are usually found in plastic, not metal, so they click on easy and don’t abrade the body when exercising.
- Affected Joint(s):
- Resistance bands can work many joints of the body, depending on what a person wants to focus on training or rehabilitating. Bands can often be used to target the sacroiliac joint with a seated row movement. Bent over rows and chest presses can work the glenerohumeral joints and the elbow joints. Band squats can work the knee and ankle joints.
- Prime Movers :
- Again, because the resistance bands are so versatile, there are many prime movers that one can choose to target. I will cover popular examples of muscles people choose to target such as the muscles of the upper arms (biceps brachii, triceps brachii, supraspinatus, deltoids).
Stabilizing muscles, including muscles controlling the axial skeleton.
- While choosing to target muscles of the upper arms, one would start by placing the band under one foot and stepping back with the other foot. Muscles of the lower leg stabilizing the band would be the Gastrocnemius, Hamstrings and Quadriceps. Keeping the core stable and tight throughout the movement would engage the Rectus abdominis, Transverse abdominis and Internal/External obliques.
- Primary Movement(s):
- Initial Body Position: The initial body position is standing upright on the ground, both legs kept straight and locked, feet staggered, back straight and arms placed in front of the body with each hand holding either handle of the band.
Max/Min. R.O.M. : The resistance band is designed to simulate many movements dependent upon what the user is trying to mimic. The band is not designed to create a resistance level high enough to reach a 1-RM max, but rather to use resistance to quantify a multiple RM level. Nor are bands designed to improve range of motion. Those who use the bands for rehabilitation, possibly those just recovering from surgery, may only be able to initially complete 1 repetition, and can build strength from there.
Resistance bands can work many joints of the body, depending on what a person wants to focus on training or rehabilitating. Bands can often be used to target the sacroiliac joint with a seated row movement. Bent over rows and chest presses can work the glenohumeral joints and the elbow joints. Band squats can work the knee and ankle joints.
Using all the above information, determine if the advertising claims of the manufacturer are valid:
If the claims have merit, identify those areas that are credible.
If any portion of the advertising is misleading, make a case for refuting the claims using sound principles of the exercise sciences.
Resistance bands offer many benefits over conventional weights and dumbbells. For one, they’re lighter and more convenient to pack while on vacation. Moreover, resistance bands offer constant tension on your muscles during the entire concentric and eccentric portions of the movement. That’s something you won’t get with free weights wherein resistance is dependent on gravity. And resistance bands can be used to many muscles in the body; they’re very versatile. Their versatility makes them a very attractive style of training.
An effective resistance band routine will yield results. I’d recommend keeping rest periods short; as one moves quickly from exercise to exercise, one will be able to get some great fat-burning cardiovascular benefits as well.
Although resistance bands allow portability and the freedom of movement, these two benefits can also be potential stumbling blocks. Certain exercises and motions require only that one stands on the band, but for other motions one may need to attach the band to a strong, stable surface at a certain height. It may be difficult to find a suitable stabilizing point, depending on the location. Also, the ability to provide resistance to almost any motion can be tantalizing; however, the risk performing the movement incorrectly is fairly high if one has not been taught proper form. My main concern with band usage lies within the knowledge of the user on proper body mechanics prior to use. Misalignment of the body during exercise can damage muscles, ligaments and tendons, and may cause serious pain. Talk to a certified trainer or exercise physiologist about the use of a resistance band first.
With proper coaching on the usage of resistance bands, I believe they can be a very effective apparatus for training and rehabilitation. I have personally used them when rehabilitating a knee injury, and have found them to be adequate tools in a physical therapy setting.
Is Stripping Aerobics for me?
Girl: Anyone know where they offer stripper pole aerobics classes in the area?
Me: My house ;P
Today via Facebook, one of my friends back from home posted a status that announced her interest in a new form of exercising, Stripper Aerobics.
The girl is a good friend from high school, so I decided to take the opportunity to make a witty remark. I mean my friend is a pretty attractive girl, no lie about that, so she probably (or actually, if you look at her FB wall) gets a lot of guys randomly hitting on her. It’s the small town of Visalia, so you have those kinda guys creeping on her FB all the time. I guess it’s the small price you pay for being pretty.
Also, trolling on FB is something I’m really good at.
But stripper pole aerobics? YES!!!!!!!!!!!
Stripping is not degrading; therefore, there is no shame in wanting to do stripper aerobics.
Here is an article by Jean Lawrence on MedicineNet.com explaining how stripping aerobics can shed off those unwanted-latenight-icecream-binge.-
To give professional strippers credit, stripping is hard. And yes this is a real profession known as EROTIC DANCING. In fact, anytime you have to pay taxes (I’ve learned), it’s considered a real job in the eyes of the United State Government.
But you know what, I applaud you stripping aerobics. Stripping is hard, I’ve tried it. And trust me, my so-called-strip-show for a bunch of sorority girls one random drunk night was not as good as the ones I’ve seen on Broadway Street on a late night in San Francisco.
Think about all the movements you have to make, all the muscles you have to use to climb up that slippery (and gross I know) silver, sometimes gold, pole, and all the dance moves you’re going to have to choreograph or reinvent to entertain your tent-pitching-guest.
Look at Carmen Electra. With her series of videos Carmen Electra Aerobic Striptease, she is one of the first pioneer of stripping aerobics. You know what, say what you want. But at age 40, she looks good.”
So girls, if you want to pick up stripping aerobics, I encourage you to. I mean when you walk into a really professional strip club, you should look at how good of shape those girls are. And I use the words “really professional” pretty loosely.
Of course however, stripper aerobics can’t fix a stripper’s face; but that’s your luck of the draw when you decide to stumble into a strip club after you and your buddies decide to leave the bars.
Who knows, maybe one day what you learn in stripping aerobics can come in handy. Maybe one day, you’re going to be trap in a fire and the only way out was to shimmy up a greased up pole that smells like cheap perfume. Or maybe perhaps (this would probably be the more practical use) one day, you and your future partner are brain storming ways to spice up your marriage and voilà! You’re able to pull out what you’ve learn in your erotic dancing [;)] classes. Then after you give your marriage a lil-spicy-salsa, you’re going to think ‘Thank you Airec, for convincing me to take stripping aerobics.’
Wishing you girls all the best and please don’t hurt yourself, Airec 😉