I Always End Up Being the Asian Housewife(Husband)

Posted on September 12, 2013 Updated on September 12, 2013

I haven’t posted in awhile, so I thought I would take this opportunity to post up another conversation that Koleana and I had, in which we somehow came to the conclusion that I end up getting emotionally/physically abused in our fake marriage.

I don’t know how it turned out like this. Of course we never intentionally meant to make fun of abusive relationships; it just started off as emasculating jokes against me and now I’m her Asian housewife who makes her imaginary Facebook dinners.

I’m pretty sure in the future I will write a post on how this all started, but for now enjoy this great post that turned into useless banter- accompanied with memes that I created!!!

Here’s one of the memes that started it all:

Now here’s the conversation!!!

Airec Syprasert to Koleana Kai McGuire

• today i met a sophomore who is studying human bio at ucsd and she expressed interest about becoming a physical therapist, but she spoke of the difficulties, so i told her about the legend of Koleana the doctor McGuire and I think she was inspired.

Koleana Kai McGuire Hahaha glad i could be an inspiration! I hope you didn’t give away too many of my secrets

Airec Syprasert haha what should i tell her when i see her next? ride unicorns to the top?

Koleana Kai McGuire Tell her the solution to everything is glitter and unicorns!

Airec Syprasert umm . . . on second thought, maybe i wont say anything more, you know, i wanna end the tale on a high note bahaha

Koleana Kai McGuire Hahaha you dick. Real talk though, tell her the solution is having a strong stomach, she’s gonna spend a lot of time in cadaver labs…especially being a human bio major

Airec Syprasert she said shes cool with everything . . . but needles. and no your a dick: a dick covered in glitter that shoots out rainbows

Koleana Kai McGuire So she gets squemish around needles, but not dead bodies? Haha ok.

Airec Syprasert i thought all white girls were squemish around needles lol

Koleana Kai McGuire Well you thought wrong!

Airec Syprasert you snow flakes surprises me everyday

Koleana Kai McGuire How dare you make generalizations based on race/skin color! Now go make me some dinner!

Airec Syprasert no please lower your voice or else people on facebook will hear; i didnt mean to make you mad. ill be a good asian wife and get started on dinner now. :*(

Airec Syprasert i hope fried rice is ok

Koleana Kai McGuire I suppose. JUST MAKE SURE ITS VEGAN!!!!

Airec Syprasert *sob *sob ok, just please dont hit me again. i told you that that pork fried rice i made you was accidental *sob *sob *hellokitty *sob

Koleana Kai McGuire No excuses! *slap*

Airec Syprasert *cries my mother warned me about white girls. why must you beat an immigrant child even more with the right hand of america

Koleana Kai McGuire Hahahahahahaaha ok this is getting outa pocket & the unicorn needs her glitter sleep for tomorrow

Airec Syprasert yeah, i think the rest of this conversation should be done on text messaging or fb message. but next time i see her ill tell her the secret to success is by beating an Asian house husband and blowing a load of glitter in his face. lol night

Daniel Uchiyama Fucking hilarious

Airec Syprasert thats the comedy style of #kokoandairec

Koleana Kai McGuire Yes, crude and almost offensive.

Airec Syprasert thats right! Good job partner *high fives laptizzle screen*

Now here is a rebuttal to my original meme (which I still forgot to post pictures from Hawaii).

-Hope y’all have a good one, Sype