games

Clashing at a Festival

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Clashing waits for no DJ
Clashing waits for no DJ

By Airec Sype

I first saw this picture from the Unofficial EDC Las Vegas group today. It was posted by Stephen Bravin. I don’t know if he took that photo or fabricated it or whatever, I just want to let everyone know this was not my original idea. But I had to show everyone it.

I first posted it on my Facebook and it was an instant hit.

Clashing comments
Clashing comments

Clash of Clans is an video game app on multiple of different mobiles. According to Urban Dictionary, C.O.C. is a highly “addictive game” in which you use “unrealistic” soldiers to help you jizz gold . . . umm yeah.

And what this young man is doing amongst half naked girls as well as caring for no Top 40’s DJ is Clashing: the act of playing Clash of Clans. Also an act of trying to regain one’s lost virginity.

Since then, 50 more people have liked my status since I screenshot my comments. Another one of my friends also added that he is guilty of this offense.

When I went home to Visalia and saw all of my friends Clashing, I thought it was just something people in small towns do . . . but apparently it’s taking over!!!

I’m not too sure if this picture of a lonesome soldiers in a sea of people protecting his clans is real or not, it could be Photoshopped. But I guess the idea of it alone is amusing enough.

Till next time, and clash safely!

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Nerdy Gamer Gets Revenge on Trash-Talking Rival

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By Airec Sype

Shit talking while online gaming isn’t something new. In fact, it is a given. If you game online, doesn’t matter MMO, fighters, shooters, etc, you’re gonna talk mad shit. Us from the Halo generation knows this firsthand; when Halo first came out and revolutionize shooters and not the preppy fratboy shooter that it’s known for now.

I know I’ve spent a good amount of my time talking shit to random people from all around the world calling them f*gs and screaming obscenities as I told them what sexual acts I’m going to do to their mother . . . sometimes fathers or their own throats . . . all in good fun of course. I mean, it’s the internet, there are no rules of kindness but the martial laws of trolls.

This CollegeHumor video, XBox Girls Get Revenge, can elaborate more on this foul mouth game we call Halo:

Never 4get the Halo T-BAG!!!

Street Fighter 4 (if you don’t know what SF4 is then you’re probably not a nerd or a boy or was a virgin till the shameful age of 20 like me) player Viscant, or Jay Snider, has experienced taste of someones balls in his mouth all too well by the hands, or sac, of Low Tier God.

I first caught this story from Dorkly during my daily Facebook browsing/creeping. Some sites called this a tale of bullying, a virtual David versus Goliath, but I really just think it was one guy talking shit and taking it a tad bit tooooooo far.

You mad bro.

scrawny white boy give a death stare at a big black boy . . . I would prob shit myself. props.

Long story short, LTG defeated Viscant (20-4) in an online game of SF4, or as the gaming community calls it: a raping (yeah, we nerds can have a harsh choice of words). To rub salt in the wound, LTG proceeded to tweet negative criticisms of Viscant, and posted a YouTube video titled “Why Most Gamers Are Single” with a picture of Viscant. I had to inform my roommate that I wasn’t watching the video for some self-awareness on why I’m a nerd and stilllll single, but instead was doing research for this post. I hope he believes me.

The whole episode of Grudge Match is an hour long, and unless you’re into fighting games like me, I don’t recommend that you watch it. But I cannot tell you how many nerdgasms occurred as I squirmed in my chair watching two fictional characters go at it . . . in a non-sexual-but-violent-and-masculine-and-geeky-kind-of-way.

In the end, Viscant was able to exact justice with a victory (10-6) over his bully. Fuuuck Yeah!!! In the first video, you can hear Viscant sling a vengeful phallic taste of revenge: “There’s going to be a time when you want to wash the taste of my dick out of your mouth.” Great cum-back Viscant (;P)

You can see a glimpse of fear in Viscant eyes that he wears on his pale face, as well as the ecstasy of victory during his post-game interview. After the onslaught that LTG unleashed upon him, he did not coward away and hide. Nor did he not know if there was going to be any retaliation from LTG during the post-game stare down. Viscant used all the energy that he received from being bullied and turned it into a fire to fuel his revenge.

Viscant also makes a statement when he tells LTG not to judge him on his clothes or his presumed lifestyle because he doesn’t know him. Being human, it’s easy to point fingers or pigeon-hole someone to make yourself feel better, feeding ones ego. But until you walk in someone else’s shoes, don’t assume anything that shines a negative light.

A lesson for all you people like LTG: if you’re going to talk shit, make sure your joystick can cash those checks or else you’re going to get humiliated all over the internet . . . or tbagged in a game of Halo. Thank you Reddit.

-Hope y’all have a good one, Sype.